Raindrops On My Window

22 posted on March 22, 2010

POSTED IN: Authenticity, Blog Posts

Ever have one of those days where the weather outside matched your mood perfectly? Today is one of those days. It’s Monday…the first glance at the window when the alarm clock went off told me it was dreary and gray outside. Nobody felt especially motivated this morning. Poor Chloe literally laid in bed and cried when we told her it was time to get up. Can’t really say that I blame her. There are some mornings when a good cry seems like an appropriate way to start the day.

It probably didn’t help that I had stressful dreams all night. I just finished a novel called One Second After about an EMP (Electromagnetic Pulse) that is detonated above the Continental US and plunges us back into the dark ages. And of course, I just had to dream about such a disaster happening so I spent the whole night planning how to gather food and protect my family. Doesn’t make for the most restful sleep.

I’m also still processing my recent trip to Africa. I saw a lot while I was there that I know is going to take me a while to think through. It’s not the kind of trip where you return happy and refreshed. There’s a lot of things that haven’t even really sunk in yet.

Throw in some sickness our family has been struggling with for the last few weeks and then add some discouraging news we’ve heard about family and friends lately and it makes for a pretty gray, yucky Monday. So yes, the raindrops on my window this morning felt very appropriate.

I always hate writing these kind of soul-baring, authentic posts because it seems people always manage to read into it. No, I’m not struggling with depression nor am I comparing myself to people who are. And, since my business and clients are usually connected to my blog I always get the concerned emails from people wondering if I’m ok (translated: are you still going to be able to finish my project?). Yes, my business is just fine.

For me, my blog is a good place to practice being real. Like most of you, I spend too much time hiding behind trite, pre-programed replies.

How are you doing?
Great! You?
Doing good. Thanks for asking.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying we need to pour our guts out to the cash register at the grocery store when they ask us how we’re doing. But we all need to have people we can unload on. We all need to be able to be honest with someone when our day sucks.

Galatians 6:2 tells us to “share each other’s troubles and problems” and encourage one another. It helps to have someone else pulling for you and to know you’re not alone.

So feel free to unload here. What are you struggling with? How can we pray for each other?

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19 Comments

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March 22, 2010

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1 Shawn said:

You’re not alone. I went on a Compassion vision trip in Oct. 2009 to Guatemala (our church already had a relationship with orphanages there) and went back again in January of this year (and am returning in August to continue serving at said orphanages.)

That being said, God’s still working on me. I’m still twisted up inside. Priorities changed. Nothing stayed the same. Things I used to call “problems” became these secondary issues that I almost felt guilty about. “How dare I complain about this after seeing such poverty?” At the same time, I hope this constant tension never leaves. It’s rather evident God’s doing his thing with me.

My Guatemala trips really made 1 Peter 4:10 http://read.ly/1Pet4.10.ESV a reality for me. It’s time to stop using my resources to glorify myself and pour out everything I have to glorify Him.

Praying for you.
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March 22, 2010

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2 Amy said:

Those days are so discouraging. I’m like you, open and real on my blog. Then the next time I see somebody, they say “Everything okay?” and by then it usually is, so I have no clue what they are talking about. LOL!

I need prayers to let go of a situation that has been eating me alive for years, and has gotten worse over the past year. I have tried to let go, and I keep letting it come back. I need wisdom, a whole lot of grace, and the ability and desire to forgive.

Praying for your day. †
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March 22, 2010

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3 Brad Ruggles said:

Thanks Shawn, yeah, those trips can sure mess you up. Really makes you re-examine your priorities.

Amy – Praying for you and your situation today. Thanks for sharing and for your prayers as well.
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March 22, 2010

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4 sTim said:

It’s funny, I’m one of those whack-a-doodles who loves cold rainy days, and usually feels more refreshed by those – but there are still certain ones even for me where I feel exactly what you’re saying. I think they coincide with Mondays or days when work is going especially badly when I feel this way on rainy days. Funny how the weather can affect your mood regardless of preference though – there are hot, sweaty sunny summer days when I’m down and I feel like I can’t stand the thought of expending the energy to move or even think on those days, so I think they hit us all.

I can’t say much publicly about what my situation would be, but I think a clever person might be able to read between the lines.
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March 22, 2010

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5 Bryan said:

While on the roller coaster of life, those days with rain drops on our windows can be hard to overcome.

My wife and I have been dealing with something at our church that has been hard to talk about with anyone close to us. In fear of being negative to others about a particular person of leadership in our church, we have kept quiet. Please pray for us and our church to get through this transition, and that we can keep our focus on Him. His plan and His will is what we need to be focused on.

Thanks Brad for the opportunity to vent and also pray for your day of rain. I’m glad you made it home to your family safely. God’s Blessings…
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March 22, 2010

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6 bondChristian said:

Yeah, thanks to the automatic, “How’s it going? How’s it going?” it can be difficult to read whether or not someone wants to actually hear about us. And it can take a lot of energy just to put into words what I’m feeling.

I like what you said about having someone (or many someones) to go to to unload our thoughts. Men, and I’m stereotyping here, tend to have more of a problem with this I’d say.

Anyway, to answer your question, I’m struggle with my job (or lack of job) situation. So yeah, that’s what’s on my mind.

-Marshall Jones Jr.
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March 22, 2010

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7 Brad Ruggles said:

Thanks for the encouragement…sometimes it helps just knowing there are others out there facing the same struggles right along with you. Or others who have it a lot worse.

Praying for all these issues everyone has mentioned.
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March 22, 2010

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8 Amy said:

I think rainy days compound our feelings sometimes. I’ll be praying you will have a better day tomorrow. It’s dreary here in Alabama today also and waking up with a severe headache and too much on my to do list makes me feel the same way. My husband’s company is moving his job to Kentucky and aren’t guaranteeing the job will last so he’s just made the difficult decision to go to work for another employer here. It’s a great opportunity with great benefits, but also a cut in pay. We will definitely be fine, but change is always hard.
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March 22, 2010

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9 Rachel L. Richard said:

Brad, you totally nailed how I’ve been feeling today. John and I are praying that you will be able to process your trip and figure out what all of this means for you and your family. We’re also praying for your family’s health. I hate those times where it seems like you pass an illness around to every person in your family and it’s forever before it leaves.

As for us, many people in my husband’s department (including my husband) got laid off about 2 weeks ago. God’s guidance and provision would be awesome right now but to be honest it sometimes feels like we are fumbling around in the dark trying to figure out which key goes to what door and even where that door is.

I wish we had a “cloud by day and a fire by night” – a clear sign of where we are headed. You know?
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March 22, 2010

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10 Lindsay said:

Praying for you on this dreary Monday. Not to be trite, but without the rain, how would we know the value of the sun? Right? Praying that the sun starts to peek through for you soon.
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March 22, 2010

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11 Sara said:

I am a long time sponsor and Compassion sponsor. I found your blog through the Compassion Bloggers and have enjoyed reading your post about the kids in Kenya.
You really hit the nail on the head with this one. There are so many times where someone aske me how I am and I find myself firing off the standard “doing good” or “Fine. how are you.” Most of the time I feel like people don’t really care or it would be to hard to explain how I am doing, so I just don’t try.
This week has been super hard and it feels like situations keep poping up left and right. I am tired of hanging on and trying to keep all the plates spinning. I would appreciate prayers for peace and the ability to trust like a child that my “Daddy” will work it all out.
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March 22, 2010

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12 Brad Ruggles said:

We can all relate to how you feel because we’ve all been there (or are there now). Praying God gives you grace and helps you know which plates to keep spinning and which ones need to be dropped.
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March 22, 2010

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13 Josh said:

I totally know the feeling, man…

I’ve been blogging about my journey through this Lenten season, focusing on participating in Christ’s death before celebrating in his resurrection. This has proved to be a painful process, as I’ve realized a lot of things in my life need to die.

My wife and I have also struggled with connecting/making friends out here in Arizona. We’ve been here almost 4 yrs and have no solid relationships…it sucks.

Praying for you, and thanks for opening your blog up for burden-bearing…good stuff.
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March 22, 2010

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14 Brad Ruggles said:

Josh, having moved to a new area a year and a half ago we can totally relate. Developing new friendships from scratch is tough. I’ll definitely pray for you man.
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March 22, 2010

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15 sTim said:

Josh – where are you at in Arizona? I know an awesome guy over in Phoenix. Friend of mine from college.
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March 22, 2010

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16 Joseph said:

Wow..timely post Brad.
I have felt this way a ton lately.

Changed positions in my company and now know NO ONE after many years.

The biggest thing I struggle with is just no one to talk to. I travel so much and spend a ton of time alone and it gets tough. I would love to just hang out with a friend now and then to talk but it is virtually impossible with my travel schedule.

Like you, not depressed or jumping off the deep end, but it would be nice now and then.
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March 22, 2010

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17 Brad Ruggles said:

I hear ya Joseph. Feel free to ring me up for coffee or lunch again next time you’re in Indy.
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March 22, 2010

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18 alece said:

thank you for putting your heart out there, brad.

i’m right there with you on this rainy-in-atlanta-too monday. this week feels especially raw for me. wednesday is a year from my husband’s decision to leave… so my heart just feels vulnerable.

you, lisa, and the girls are in my prayers.
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March 22, 2010

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19 Brad Ruggles said:

And you are in ours dear friend.